1y3m27d : Communicating

So very little time has passed and my newborn baby girl is really just morphing rapidly into a little person.  MJ's communication efficiency is breathtaking. She doesn't have all the words, but we use sign language and she has distinct sounds. I know what she means. She can clearly indicate yes and no, and when offered choices make preferential selections. She shows she understands things that I don't always think she's going to.

For example, we're currently working on getting her to wear her helmet when in the bicycle bucket. This is mostly in preparation for moving to a front sitting bench position, as I don't want her sitting on the bench without a helmet.  Of course, like most children, she has hated things on her head from the beginning. I had all these lovely little newborn caps that she flat out refused to wear.  The other day after nursery pick-up I was loading her into the bike and she of course did not want to wear her helmet.  I said something along the lines of, "Please, MJ, mommy would really like you to wear your helmet, please." and I made the sign for 'please' to go with it. And she sort of looked at me, stopped yelling, and let me put the helmet on her head. It was amazing!!

Of course, I also think she understands when I say, it's time to do bedtime soon and we need to upstairs and she hustles away from me. Or just frowns and shakes her head.  So this isn't all smiles and rose petals!  Toddler attitude is real!

When I think about how short a time span it's been, and I look at pictures of my little baby from a  year ago, it's really mind blowing to think about how far we've come. And I know how much more she's going to continue to gain in the upcoming months.  It's so hard to capture these little moments of wonder. They all fly by so quickly.

1y0m23d : Ignoring milestones

It is impossible not to compare your child to other children.  MJ is completely developmentally normal. She has not excelled in any particular area, but she is also not behind. She pulls to stand and cruises, but she is not walking yet. She makes an assortment of noises, and some are very close to being words for things (pretty sure we have 'quack quack' going for ducks and birds) but doesn't really have words or sounds that are clearly specific. And she is otherwise an engaging, curious, and regular toddler.

Of course then I see on some forum that someone's doctor said that by one year their child should have 3-4 words. And on this bog standard site that if your child isn't standing independently by 11 months they'll perform worse at age 4 than those that do. It's hard not to let little concerns creep in, although I'm generally good at ignoring them. I get why we need milestones, but maybe they should be 'if your child hasn't done x,y,z by this date, you need to see your doctor' which would remove the average from the discussion. Because an average is exactly that, an average!

Of course then there's research like this which suggests its the later social-emotional skills of your 4 year old that have a greater impact on their adult well being.

In my NCT of 8, where all the babies were born within 6 weeks of each other, we currently have 3 walkers. None of which are the oldest two (of which MJ is one) and I think only one with clear words, although I could be wrong there. So, as I said, developmentally normal. Not ahead, not behind. Sometimes for your own sanity, I think it's important to ignore the milestones.